Children with Conduct Disorder manipulate to get what they want, and will often steal things of little value. When confronted about the newly acquired item, they come up with a believable lie as to how it came into their possession. While the theft itself may be insignificant, differentiated from the theft that occurs with aggressive behaviors, it is the manipulative behavior that's associated with domination.
Parents and teachers must open the lines of communication and work together to prevent children with Conduct Disorder from stealing at school, whether it is from the teachers or from other students. Regardless of the child’s age, strong communication is essential and the child needs to be involved in creating the behavior plan so that he knows he cannot manipulate or lie his way out of a situation.
Creating a Behavior Plan to Prevent Theft at School
In order to prevent children with Conduct Disorder from stealing at school it is essential for parents and teachers to work together to create and implement a behavior plan. The behavior plan should address the issues of stealing as well as lying, and include preventative measures, eliminating the opportunity. Although the behavior plan will be individual to the child, these basic interventions should be included:
- Limiting items brought to school – In order to prevent the child from saying he brought something from home, limit what he brings to school each day – backpack, schoolbooks, homework. It may be necessary to keep all schoolbooks at school and make alternative arrangements for homework so the child has nothing to bring back and forth to school.
- Establish a checkout point – At the end of the day, have the child empty his pockets and monitor everything he takes out of the classroom.
- Changing between classrooms – In more severe cases it may be necessary to keep the child’s notebooks and school supplies in each classroom. This way he never has anything to carry between classes and is easily monitored as he enters and leaves the classroom.
- Move his desk and backpack away from others – This helps to prevent the child from stealing items from his classmates’ desks and backpacks.
- One-on-one hall monitor – Make arrangements for an adult to walk with the child between classes, in the hallways, to the bus and any time he is out of the classroom to monitor his behavior.
- Rewards and praise – Give immediate praise for not taking things that do not belong to him. Set up a reward system and every day he leaves class without stealing, he earns points towards a special reward – such as an extra recess, a special pencil, one-on-one time with the teacher, anything meaningful to the child. Send a note home when teachers give rewards to the child.
Implementing the Behavior Plan Effectively at Home
Before putting the behavior plan into place, sit down as a team — parents, teachers, child, therapist, caregivers — and discuss the plan in detail. It is important that everyone, including the child, knows exactly what the expectations and consequences are, as well as the reasons for such a plan.
In order to be effective, the plan needs to be in effect immediately and consistently. Without consistency, the child quickly learns that he can sometimes get away with it and maybe he will not be caught. This defeats the purpose of the behavior plan and makes it ineffective in preventing the theft from occurring.
As soon as the child gets home from school, before he has a chance to go any farther than the door, he checks in his backpack and empties his pockets. Anything that did not go to school with him is confiscated unless there is a note from the teacher accompanying the item.
As the parent, go through the backpack and remove anything that does not belong, regardless of where the child says it came from or why he has it. He will try to negotiate to get the item, but it is essential to avoid any conversation during the process – simply remove the items without questioning or discussion.
Everything goes into a box and at the end of the week the parent takes the box to school for the teacher to go through. The teacher then reclaims anything belonging to the school. Items given to the child by the teacher without a note are returned to the child and everything else is trash, regardless of where the child says they came from or why he was given them. If the teacher cannot verify that the items were give to the child, he does not get them back.
Natural and Logical Consequences and Rewards
Establishing natural and logical consequences and rewards is necessary to motivate the child to stop stealing items from school. However, that which is natural and logical to the parent may not be natural and logical to the child. If the consequences and rewards do not make sense to the child, the behavior plan will have no effect in changing behavior and will merely help prevent school items from disappearing. Likewise, a lack of natural and logical consequences that make sense to the child may result in the child simply becoming sneakier about the theft in order to avoid being caught.
Help the child understand that the checking-in of the backpack, emptying of the pockets and lack of privacy are not meant as a punishment, but a natural and logical consequence of stealing and lying. Likewise, having things taken away that another child or teacher gave him is a consequence of stealing and lying. If he were honest, the adults would not question him about where things came from.
Rewards and praise for not stealing are just as essential as the consequences. Parents and teachers need to actively notice and praise the child when he comes home without pocketing things from school. The positive rewards should be evident both at home and at school. They should be immediate at each occurrence and additional meaningful rewards for going a set length of time without stealing – gradually increasing the length of time before the next major reward.
*While the designation ‘he’ is used to represent all children, the use of ‘he’ does not imply this is relevant only to males. The behaviors and strategies are equally relevant to females. The designation of ‘he’ or ‘she’ should be considered interchangeable.
Additional Articles Relating to Conduct Disorder and Antisocial Behavior:
Successfully Parenting Siblings of Children with Conduct Disorder
Home and School Support for Children with Conduct Disorder
Managing Aggressive Conduct Disorder Behavior for School Safety
Aggressive Antisocial Behavior in Children with Conduct Disorder
Manipulative Behaviors of Kids with Antisocial Conduct Disorder
References:
“DSM-IV-TR Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders”; The American Psychiatric Association; 2000.
“The Parenting Skills Treatment Planner”; Sarah Edison Knapp and Aurthur E. Jongsma Jr; 2005.
Malysa Stratton Louk - Malysa Stratton Louk is a freelance writer, journalist & photographer in the Pacific Northwest. View her full profile for more ...
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