Each person plays a different role in the various relationships in life. The differences between males and females are most evident when it comes to relationships. Understanding these differences — along with acknowledging that men roles in a relationship are much different than women roles — will help to build healthy, stable and long-term meaningful relationships.
Kabbalah teaches that understanding the relationship roles of men and women not only strengthens the relationship but strengthens the soul. From a kabbalistic perspective, this also increases the soul’s spiritual connection with the Light and with G-d.* When each soul is spiritually connected to the Light, soul mate relationships become possible.
Men and Women in Soul Mate Relationships
Men and women often run into difficulty when trying to find a soul mate. Kabbalah teaches that the difficulty often arises due to a lack of spiritual connection with the Light, especially to those who are actively searching for a soul mate.
The difficulty can also come from a lack of understanding the specific role of men and women in a soul mate relationship. The goal of both the male and the female soul is to share the Light and energy within. The differences between the male and female soul are largely based on how their Light is shared at both the physical and the spiritual level.
Male Roles in a Relationship – Channels for the Light
Kabbalah teaches that the male soul is a channel for the Light in which “energy goes in and comes out.” On a physical level, the desire to share his energy and Light reveals itself as sexual desire. The male energy desires a physical connection with the female energy.
On a spiritual level, it's said that the soul of man needs to share the Light in order to fulfill the Vessel. According to Yehuda Berg, “What men want more than anything in a relationship is the ability to make a woman happy and earn her love,” regardless of whether men are aware of this or not which results in men being action-oriented.
The soul of man is designed to bring Light into the world for the purpose of fulfilling the Vessel. Men show this through action, fixing things, making things better, solving the problem, whatever that may be. Kabbalah teaches that this is how a man shares the Light he is receiving, by satisfying and fulfilling the Vessel.
Female Roles in a Relationship – Vessels for the Light
Women roles in a relationship are much different than men roles. As the Vessel, Kabbalah teaches that it is the women’s job to manage and direct the incoming Light flowing to her from the male soul. The role of women is to respect, support and allow the male soul’s desire to share the Light and fulfill the Vessel.
According to Kabbalistic teachings, it is the women’s responsibility to direct and manage the incoming Light because “she is a revealer of Light. She takes the energy that a man channels — all of his Divine potential — and gives it shape. She is like the glass that gives shape to the water it contains.” (Yehuda Berg)
It is the women who decides whether to accept the incoming and Light and how to direct that energy when it is offered. When a man offers to share his Light, the woman must give a clear direction for the energy. The male Light will continue to offer until it understands whether to proceed or not.
The Channel and the Vessel
The channel of Light and the Vessel must work together and be at equivalent spiritual levels. Kabbalah teaches that the channel never changes, although the Vessel has the ability to change shape and availability. If a channel is not bringing in enough Light, the Vessel does not have to remain open. In Kabbalah, men — as channel of Light — must have a Vessel to fulfill, whereas women — as Vessels — have the ability to create their own Light.
Additional information on relationship roles and soul mate relationships can be found in The Spiritual Rules of Engagement by Yehuda Berg.
Malysa Stratton Louk - Malysa Stratton Louk is a freelance writer, journalist & photographer in the Pacific Northwest. View her full profile for more ...
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